4 College Money Talks

Talk #2: Let’s Talk About What College Actually Costs

🎯 Goal

Build financial understanding without overwhelm, set realistic expectations early, and help your child feel included, responsible, and in control of their future.

Okay — now that we’re seeing the college search differently, let’s talk about what college actually costs.

And I don’t mean just the tuition sticker price. I mean the full picture.

A lot of people skip this part. They assume they’ll “figure it out later.”

But we’re not doing that. Because you deserve to make this decision with your eyes wide open — and your future self will thank you for it.

Let’s break it down:

[Note: Numbers are rounded for ease]

Step 1: The Cost of Attendance

Colleges list their “Cost of Attendance” online — what some people call the “sticker price.” There are ways we can possibly pay a lower price, which we’ll explore later.

For now, as an example, let’s look at the average cost of a top private university.

The average annual tuition + fees is $65,000 each year.

Step 2: Don’t Forget the Extras

Now, tuition is just the beginning. There are a lot of other expenses to consider each year, like:

  • Food and housing = $19,000.

  • Books and supplies = $1,200.

  • You’re going to want to come home to see us (we hope!). So we have to factor in travel costs of around $1,100.

  • Then there’s your social life — think coffee runs, nights out with your friends, and other things we don’t want to think about… Figure about $2,000.

  • There are always miscellaneous expenses of around $2,100.

  • And we can expect tuition to go up around $3,500 each year.

Altogether that comes out to over $94,000 each and every year you’re in school.

And for four years, thats over $376,000 of our money we'd give to a school 🤯.

We were shocked too. It adds up fast. That’s why so many families get caught off guard.

Which is why it's so great we're having this conversation now.

Step 3: Explain the Role of Merit Aid

Here’s the good news: There are schools that would love to have you, and many offer big money to prove it.

This is called merit aid: money awarded for your grades, test scores, or talents. Not based on financial need.

But here’s the catch: many of the most “prestigious” schools don’t offer merit aid at all. They don’t have to — people are falling over themselves to pay full price.

So when you’re looking beyond the Top 25 hype, you’re actually opening the door to financial freedom with the same great college experience and career outcomes.

The Debt Reality (Without the Lecture)

Let’s get real for a second.

When families realize a school will cost tens of thousands more than expected, they often try to “make it work” with loans.

But a loan isn’t free money. It’s a debt anchor you drag through life. ⚓

The payment on a loan of just $50k plus interest is over $600 every month for 10+ years. Imagine what you could use that money for each month instead of handing it to a bank!

Some grads delay moving out of their parents' house, changing careers, even starting a family — not because they aren’t ready, but because they’re paying off a bad decision they made at 17.

If you want to see what this really looks like, there’s a quick example we found that blew our minds. [👉 Share the Eli & Tessa Story]

❤️ Wrap-Up

This isn’t about limiting your options. It’s about expanding them — and protecting your future.

You’re ahead of the curve just by having this conversation. Most teens don’t.

There are schools out there that will see your value and make it financially doable — we just have to not fall for the hype and marketing out there that wants us to overspend.

Next Step

Let’s meet again and talk through what our family can actually contribute, and how we’ll make the best choice for everyone involved.

What time works best for you in the next week?